People.

Why do people make it there mission in life to make me miserable?  I may be in college now.but that hasn't changed at all. even my roommates now. i swear. they hate me. and want me to have a horrible life.we'll guess what? it's working. they constantly ditch me. they don't want me to be included in anything. and right now.i feel so alone.i feel like i don't have any friends. not even my best friend. i feel like she doesn't want to help me. but she's expecting me to help her with her problems. -sighs- She's told me she hates relationships like that. but now she's doing it to me. i texted he about a delema i was having. and i wanted advice. and all she said was. "i sorry." and "that sucks." even after i asked what should i do. thats all i would get in a reply. i don't want to question our friendship. but today i couldn't stop questioning it. i just thought the thoughts to myself. i haven't said anything to her. now. you might be wondering why i put this on my blog. but i can tell you. that i know for a fact that she doesn't read it. so it doesn't matter. -sighs-i'm starting to just wonder if i'm even met to have friends? or at least life lasting ones.I don't know why i even try anymore. I think i've decided i'm going to be a pessimist. since i practically am one anyways. i'm starting to think horrible thoughts again. -sighs- if i actually did die. no one would care. so why am i alive? maybe i'm just a horrible person. i don't know.....it feels like i don't deserve to live. maybe i shouldn't live.